Heathers

A really fun drinking game to play while watching Heathers is to take a drink anytime anyone says Heather and a shot anytime anyone dies. And by really fun, I mean really dangerous. And by really dangerous I mean only play this game with an EMT nearby. And by EMT I mean your friend Adam, who will knock on the bathroom door while you're vomiting and say repeatedly "I'm schcoming in, I don't sink you're sokay 'Lena"

With that aside let's talk about Heathers. This is a movie made in the 80's starring Winona Ryder playing a girl named....Veronica? Veronica is a member of a clique in her high school called the Heathers because they are all named Heather except for Veronica. The leader of the Heathers, Heather (Kim Walker) is pretty relentless. She gives mean notes to sad girls, she asks shallow newspaper poll questions, asks people to fuck her gently with a chainsaw, and she only talks to people she thinks are worth her time. Standard high school asshole shit. Veronica kind of accidentally joined the group and doesn't really want to be a part of it.

I think of this like the film 'Mean Girls' but it's darker and better and great. What I like about this is that I always thought that Mean Girls' esque movies were kind of bullshit. I don't know what high school all these screenwriters went to, but when I went to school there was never such a clear divide between who was cool and who was not, not everyone had their own clique, people just sort of chilled with whomever they felt like (and whomever had weed). Heathers takes those cliches about high school and attacks them in such a veracious and ridiculous way it sort of feels like it's making fun of itself sometimes.

Veronica (Ryder) meets Christian Slater and his eyebrows in the cafeteria. Promptly after their meeting Christian Slater pulls out a gun a shoots blanks in some football chodes faces. And Veronica OBVIOUSLY falls in love with him. Because what in God's name is more attractive then pretend shooting people with a real gun? The answer is nothing.

So I know I sort of gave a little bit away by saying you take a shot when someone dies, but I don't want to give too much away because this movies has surprises you probably should discover on your own time. Needless to say Slater doesn't end up as stable as he appeared originally. And Veronica doesn't end up as strong as she originally seemed earlier.

There are a lot of goofy shots, great dream sequences, and generally campy feeling to the direction. I don't think you'll be disappointed.

Again this is Mean Girls but better. Watch it and let me know how you feel in the comments below.

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~Alena Ivanov